Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Teen Choice Awards - WTF

Ok, so maybe I'm just getting old but what was up with the Teen Choice Awards last night.

Whose idea was it to incorporate a stripper pole into Miley Cyrus' act? She comes out of a trailer, spreads her legs a few times and then jumps up on an ice cream cart equipped with a stripper pole????

The whole thing was weird.

Did they assume that because it was on an ice cream cart, all would be forgiven?

She looked hot but I am confused about the direction she is going. I understand she is getting older and that maybe she wants to distance herself from Disney but isn't there a better way to do it. The only thing missing from this performance was a baby belly, a dad with a shotgun and a pimply faced boy in a wife beater t-shirt with a heart tattoo on his arm.

Thank goodness this was the Teen Choice Awards not the Kids Choice Awards but really, is the audience that different???

Amanda??? You want to weigh in??

Oh, I will Maria.

I am beyond shocked. BEYOND. Ehh, actually, I WAS shocked. For the first few minutes there's just a 'Wtf. Seriously? What do her parents think? They're .... applauding?'

Then, the realization kicked in that she's from Tennessee. The light bulb went on over my head and I had one of those lucid moments where the clouds part as a ray of light shines down upon you.

'That's how they do it in the south,' said a voice oddly like Morgan Freeman but clearly God. I understood. Then, I was bored.

Miley, you see, only the south understands your crazy language and only they can appreciate your 'deer-in-the-headlights' form of "beauty".

Opt-out of your record deal and give them to your back-up singers. Return the horrendous outfits you and your father think are fashionable and call Britney for her therapist. You could use it.


Amanda. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Cindy B. of Montana said...

I'm guessing maybe it's supposed to be the pole for an umbrella over the cart??? Well, maybe...but they could have had less suggestive dancing if that was the case!

Renee said...

Honey, I'm from the south and I don't understand or appreciate a hooker training tool at the Teen Choice Awards :) I'm so glad my daughter doesn't have a clue about anyone named Paris, Brittney, Miley, or any other celebrities for that matter.

Kaitlin said...

Um, excuse me? I'm from the south, and I ain't seein' anything right with this performance. Just because someone's from a certain place, doesn't mean they act a certain way. She practically lives in the 90210. Please don't dis my home. You have no clue.